Mediation is a process that gives people a chance to speak to and be heard by one another and work towards reaching agreements, rebuilding relationships, and finding permanent solutions to their disputes. Mediation is not the opposite of legal services but allows people the chance to speak for themselves and make their own decisions.

Conflict coaching is a one-on-one session between someone experiencing conflict and a trained facilitator known as a “coach.” The coach helps by prompting you with questions that help analyze the conflict from your perspective and the perspective of the other people involved in the conflict. The coach then works with you to explore options to navigate the conflict more effectively.

The conflict coach is a neutral, third-party, who does not take sides, give advice, or advocate for any particular course of action. Instead, the coach will discuss options with you to help you gain clarity and make your own decisions about a dispute. Along the way, you will develop skills that could help you as you move forward after the conflict coaching session.

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Call us at (314) 255-7449 or visit CRCSTL.ORG/GETHELP to explain your situation. A staff member will ask you some questions to determine if our conflict resolution services are a good fit. If so, they will explain the process and schedule a conflict coaching session. Conflict coaching is the first step in our conflict resolution process. After a conflict coaching session, you can get connected with a mediator. If the other person in your conflict wishes to participate in mediation, our team will work with you both to find a time to mediate.

Mediation can help solve problems between neighbors, landlords and tenants, consumers and merchants, organizations, businesses, co-workers, housemates, church members, and others. We offer mediation on issues such as pets, noise, lifestyle, rental agreements, money and more. We are available to address any dispute that could conceivably be resolved through dialogue, as long as both parties are genuinely interested in finding a resolution to the problem and can make decisions for themselves.

Within the City of St. Louis, our community, housing, and St. Louis City employee mediations are offered at no cost. All other mediations may have an associated cost, which would be shared with you during the intake.

Mediation agreements include only realistic steps that both parties are willing and able to carry out. Our experience is that mediation agreements usually hold up–because the signers developed it themselves. However, the parties anticipate what the consequences will be if the agreed-upon actions are not taken and include in the agreement future steps that they will take if the agreement is not kept.

Our mediators are local volunteers trained in communication and conflict resolution. They have a wide variety of career backgrounds and interests, and they share a commitment to serve their community. We use one to two mediators for each session. Prior to mediation, the mediators are provided only with a brief summary of the situation and the names of the participants. Mediators are not assigned to a case if they know the participants personally or if they have any stake in the outcome of the mediation.

The mediator’s role is to help guide the mediation process and facilitate the conversation. They are there to help communication by helping people explain their viewpoint, clarify issues, identify underlying concerns, explore possible solutions–and, where possible, reach a mutually agreeable agreement. Their role is NOT to give advice, make decisions, or decide who is right or wrong.

A mediation begins by the mediator welcoming and introducing all participants. Then, each party gets an uninterrupted opportunity to describe the conflict from their perspective while the mediator and other party listen. The mediator asks clarifying questions along the way, which often brings out important information that may not have been known or understood before.

Sometimes, the mediator asks for a private meeting or “caucus” with one disputant at a time in order to allow them to express their thoughts more freely or to explore possible solutions with them. Either party in mediation can also ask to caucus privately with the mediator at any time.

In the final part of the mediation, potential solutions are discussed. The mediators have no intent or role in influencing the outcome. Their only interest is to help negotiate agreements that are satisfactory to both parties. If the parties agree on steps to take, their decisions are written into an agreement that spells out what will be done. That agreement is signed, and copies are given to all participants.

Yes. For the parties to feel free to discuss the issues openly, everyone present signs a confidentiality agreement before the mediation session begins. Confidentiality means information revealed in the session will be kept private and not shared with others outside the mediation or in any future legal case.

Mediation sessions are scheduled for two hours. Although many sessions do not take the full two hours, the parties are expected to set aside that amount of time. Occasionally, a second mediation session is needed, which can be scheduled at the end of the session, if both parties agree. Please bring your calendar with you to check your availability should another session need to be arranged.

Conflict coaching sessions take no more than one hour. An additional session can be scheduled with the CRCSTL staff should more time be required.

We prefer that only the parties directly involved in the dispute participate in the mediation session. In general, the fewer people at the mediation the better. Those present must have the power to reach an agreement that will settle the dispute.

If you wish to have a friend or family member join you, please tell us about that person when the date and location of the mediation is being arranged. Both parties should know in advance and agree on who will attend the mediation. Please do not bring people not previously agreed upon by the other party in the dispute.

Mediation is not like going to court or to an administrative hearing. In both settings you prepare to present your view of what has occurred as clearly and fully as possible. In mediation you should also think ahead about possible solutions for your situation, rather than convincing the mediator that your position is “right”.

To prepare for a mediation, consider:

The issues you want discussed.

The reasons underlying your position on those issues and their relative importance.

The other party’s probable reasoning.

What you want from the other person(s) to settle the dispute.

Your flexibility regarding your current position, and what you’re willing to accept and do to settle the dispute.

Others with whom you should consult before negotiating an agreement.

State laws, court rules, or local ordinances that may govern your situation. It is your responsibility to inform yourself about applicable laws, not the mediator’s.

Since our mediators volunteer their time to help you resolve your dispute, it is extremely important that you attend the mediation session scheduled for you. Cancel only in case of an emergency, and please notify us 24 hours before your mediation is scheduled.

You can always call us to see if we are able to offer a follow-up mediation!